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     Can you live in a civil way amongst your own? 
    Are you civil or a little less?

    You're at a restaurant. How do you clean your mouth?
    With the napkin! What kind of question is that?
    With the table cloth, that way they don't have to wash the napkin.
    With my tie of course! I should start using my jacket sleeve, that way I wouldn't have to bend my neck as much.

    you're going into a posh place for dinner. Do you go first or does your wife?
    I do. I'm single.
    I do. My wife is female and therefore inferior.
    My wife. I am a gentleman.

    Is chivalry dead?
    What's chivalry?

    A beautiful woman asks you out but she's really upper-class. What do you do?
    Refuse the invitation. What's class?
    Accept immediately. That girl and you are on the same wave length.
    You're not sure so you ask her for her number.

    How much water spills out of your shower?
    Spills? I thought the excess was used for cleaning.
    Not even a drop. I'm not messy.
    10-15 liters

    Speaking of which...Do you shower?
    Of course. Every day.
    Every other day.
    What's a shower?

    An elderly lady gets on the bus and you:
    Offer her your seat.
    Ask if she wants an ice cream.
    Tell her that standing is good for her circulation.

    You're with your little sister and she sees the doll that she's been wanting for quite some time. You:
    Tell her that you haven't got the money.
    You get it for her.
    You tell her that you'll get it for her tomorrow and obviously you won't.

    Are you a man or a woman?

    What do you think of this test?
    A crock of shit.

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